#481: Belle and Sebastian, ‘If You’re Feeling Sinister’

Jeepster, 1996

I was first introduced to Belle and Sebastian through their 2014 movie, God Help The Girl. I know, I know, I was late to the Belle and Sebastian game. My friend Danny showed me that movie and I remember sitting in his basement apartment and crying through all the Olly Alexander moments. It was one of many wonderful moments with Danny.

As I listened to this album, I thought about Danny. I have not seen nor been with Danny since at least 2016.

Whenever I saw Danny, I would say something along the lines of “You are one of the best people” or “You are my favorite” or “You are the coolest.” One day Danny finally told me he felt like I didn’t mean those words. He shared examples of me saying those exact phrases to other people right in front of him. It wasn’t an anxious conversation, it was just him telling me that it wasn’t a good look for me to keep throwing those emphatic compliments to everyone that crossed my path expecting for those around me to feel all fuzzy about our friendship.

It was my first lesson in sincerity.

Belle and Sebastian drip with sincerity that feels like it was saved just for the listener.

Danny walked me through this with kindness and tenderness in the same tone that Belle and Sebastian write their songs.

I am all about inclusiveness and making sure everyone feels like they should take up space but I am also learning that in my personal relationships there must be some sense of exclusivity. It is important for some things to be special and sometimes sincerity most comfortably dwells within the cracks of those unique moments we have with each other.

There is so much room to take our time and reserve points in the journey for special moments. I owe my friends the compliments that are unique to themselves and unique to how they thrive in those special moments.

Belle and Sebastian’s music screams this understanding and I am grateful Danny let me in on this secret.

Top songs: The Stars of Track and Field, Like Dylan In the Movies, It You’re Feeling Sinister, Judy and the Dream of Horses